Depressed?

About a week or two ago, I had reach my lowest point in life. Since my birthday, my heart has been slowly hitting rock bottom. I've only had the chance to tell someone how I truly felt once. It was to someone who gets me so angry every so often. He's really a good person and I thank him for being here for me. The thing that bothers me the most is that I couldn't tell anyone else other than him. I just wasn't comfortable telling my closest friends. I know I have friends who will always help me through what ever and whenever, but this, I just couldn't.

I've been stuck on this guy for about 8 months now. He's got me going crazy. I miss him and think about him constantly. I've really haven't had anyone impact me like this before. Not even my first boyfriend would top this guy. He's really a good guy and though I'm head over heals for him, I'd just love to be friends with him only. It's really hard right now because I feel as if he doesn't care for anything what's so ever. Yet I know he does. In the back of my mind I want to say that he was leading me on, but is it true? Was he just wanting to get some attention? No, was he just a pimp? Getting all the girls he wants. Just messing with our feelings? I really want to him to know that I care for him deeply within my heart. I don't know if it's love, or if I just like him so much, but it's time for me to move on.

When I was at my lowest, I began to cry out of no where. Grades began to drop. I started to care less about food, people, homework, school, and I had the urge to quit dance. Dance is my life. If all this was happening all at the same time, I knew something was wrong with me. It had to stop. Was I depressed. All I did was try to pay attention during school, get distracted during dance practices, and when I'm home, it's even worse. I would just lay in bed for 2 or 3 hours when I should be eating or doing homework. I didn't understand what was happening to me at first. But after 2 weeks of not doing homework and coming home and just staring at the ceiling, My life needed to change. He still pops up in my head once in awhile, but I'm really trying to forget about him and move on. It's such a difficult thing to do. But it's to make me feel better. If it's going to make me a stronger person then I have no choice but to move on. Just like the saying, "If you love someone so much, you got to let them go..."